Generation Weenie

Little Timmy can’t play Tag at school anymore, at least not in Attleboro, Mass. He can’t play flag football or dodgeball either. Why? He might get a boo boo prompting a series of weeniesuits which the school wishes to avoid. But that’s not the reason that the school administrators voted for this ban. It was because dodgeball is exclusionary and dangerous. Celeste D’Elia doesn’t mind. She says her son feels safer without all of the shenanigans going on around him. Of course, it’s not a safe as the D’Elia household, where all weenie offspring sit in a corner wrapped in bubble wrap sucking their antiseptic-wiped thumbs.